Finally getting the number of someone you’re interested in is thought of as a big victory, and it can be really exciting and fun, but there’s a fair share of challenges that come with it. While it looks like an easy task, texting can be anxiety-inducing as there are a lot of little but rather significant things to consider, like if you should be the first one to text, or if you should wait longer before you reply, or even the exact way you should be responding. It is normal to worry, but you may want to keep in mind the following six tips to help lessen your anxieties.
How to Deal with Anxiety of Texting when Dating Someone New
1.Don’t overthink it
The way someone responds to text messages can easily be misunderstood. Maybe they took too long to reply, or their reply is too short. Getting to know someone new comes with anxiety that can influence how we interpret their response and how we answer back, so don’t overthink and read too much into it, and take their messages at face value.
2.Remember that not everyone has the same texting style as you
Just as you have your own way of texting, the person you’re interested in also has their own. Remember that everyone’s texting styles differ, and just because they reply in a certain way, it doesn’t necessarily mean they are or aren’t interested in you.
3.Keep it short and sweet
There is a tendency to overanalyze how you send or respond to text messages when you’re talking to someone new, but it doesn’t have to be like that. Keep your messages short and simple, and don’t overcomplicate it. You don’t have to try too hard to impress them, especially when you’re just getting to know them better.
It should also be noted that you shouldn’t respond with texts that are too short because that can make you seem uninterested. Make it short and sweet but engaging enough to the person you’re talking to.
4.Be aware of your tone
Gauging someone’s tone is not easy via text, so that means your tone can also be misinterpreted. Be careful of how you might be sounding while you’re joking, teasing, or flirting, as they might see it the wrong way and you might offend them, and they might think you’re crossing the line. It’s always good to be cautious of what you’re typing and to read it to yourself and make sure it sounds okay before sending. An extra tip is to use emojis while texting to help relay your message better.
5.Make an impression
Keep your conversations engaging and interesting, and make a good impression with your language. It might not seem like it, but good grammar and spelling matter, and you don’t want to accidentally be misunderstood because of misused words and punctuation marks. Be careful when using shortened words and abbreviations as well, like “ttyl” or “smh” because they might take it the wrong way if they don’t know what they mean.
Along with the tips mentioned above, you should always remain calm. Don’t antagonize how long it takes them to reply to your messages, and don’t be pushy and passive-aggressive. Never depend your emotions and texts on how they respond as this can influence your own response, and negative responses can be a turn-off. Don’t let texting be a cause of stress. Learn to wait and be patient, and gauge their interest in texting and adjust accordingly.
Texting someone new can be worrying and confusing as there are a lot of things that you need to think about. It’s always a learning curve, but practice the tips listed above and you will see how much easier it can be.